My little love story

Who am I? What is my purpose? These are some of the questions I often ask myself. I am like everyone else; I don't have all the answers but I know I’ve been placed on this earth to ask questions, to seek truth, goodness and meaning. I started this site to share what I have experienced and learnt so far on my quest to live life to the fullest. I believe a “healthy ever after” life begins with a healthy relationship with one self. ‘Cause when you love yourself and find your self, you unlock the secret to a happier life.

A lot has happened in the past 12 years. Soon after graduating from college, I dove head on into the business world, founding The Clearwater Group with my husband. We've had 3 kids since then and somehow managed to keep a full head of hair (some which have turned grey) even while going through some pretty rocky patches in our marriage (Unless you live in a Disney fairytale, all marriages need work!). Life can get pretty overwhelming and at many points in my life I felt like I was drowning.

I reached out to therapists, life coaches, psychiatrists (I had maniac postpartum depression after having Jora) my mother etc. but nothing helped until I found- Yoga.

My journey with Yoga started 7 years ago when suffering from lower back pain caused by multiple slipped discs (7 to be exact). I recall telling my yoga teacher, Lay Gaik, that all I wanted was to bend down and touch my toes and to find some relief from the nagging lower back pain. Soon after, I fell in love with the practice and discovered that not only it was good for my physical body, it also offered my mind a sense of peace and grounding. I realised that on the days that I practised yoga, the quality of my day would be like:

My love of the practice grew, so in 2016 I decided to dive in further, to truly understand "what is yoga?" I reached out to a teacher, Sarah, whom I knew from visiting Bali in 2013. I did a week of prenatal yoga with her (I was 10 weeks pregnant with Jaan. I also think Jaan is such a happy baby cuz I did so much Yoga when he was inside me!) and she was the first teacher who taught me how to meditate.

To be honest I didn't like meditation at the beginning. I never saw myself as someone who could sit and meditate but Sarah made meditation easy by guiding me through it. I absolutely loved the way she taught, and thus reached out to Sarah for her advice on a suitable Teacher training. She pointed me towards Tara Judelle.

Long story short, I went to Bali for a month in September 2016 and underwent a month of intense training. It was mentally, emotionally and physically challenging. The training evoked several hidden demons, the biggest being waking up at 5:45 every morning (I'm so not a morning person).

Tara's Yoga training didn’t just prepare me to be a teacher, but it also shifted my perspective on life. To be honest, I was only hoping to master Srisasana (Head stand pose) and maybe lose a few pounds! Spoiler: None of that happened, no headstand and scale did not budge. But, I found my truest self.